An atheist professor was teaching a college class and he told the class that he was going to prove that there is no God. He said, "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you 15 minutes!"  Ten minutes went by. He kept taunting God, saying, "Here I am, God. I'm still waiting." He got down to the last couple of minutes and a Marine just released from active duty, and newly registered in the class, walked up to the professor, hit him full force in the face, and sent him flying from his platform. The professor struggled up, obviously shaken and yelled, "What's the matter with you? Why did you do that?"  The Marine replied, "God was busy; He sent me."  Semper Fi

While attending a marriage seminar on communication, Wally and his wife Carolyn listened to the instructor declare, "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things, that are important to each other." He addressed the men, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?" Wally leaned over, touched Carolyn's arm gently and whispered, "Pillsbury All-Purpose, isn't it?"
And thus began Wally's life of celibacy....

1973: Long hair
2003: Longing for hair
1973: KEG
2003: EKG
1973: Acid rock
2003: Acid reflux

1973: Moving to California

because it's cool
2003: Moving to California

because it's warm
1973: Growing pot
2003: Growing pot belly

1973: Trying to look like

Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2003: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

1973: Seeds and stems
2003: Roughage
1973: Killer weed
2003: Weed killer

1973: Going to a new, hip joint
2003: Receiving a new hip joint
1973: Rolling Stones
2003: Kidney Stones

1973: Being called into the

principal's office
2003: Calling the principal's

office

1973: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2003: Children begging you to get their heads shaved

1973: Passing the drivers' test
2003: Passing the vision test
1973: Whatever
2003: Depends

1973: Disco
2003: Costco

1973: Screw the system
2003: Upgrade the system

1973: The Grateful Dead
2003: Dr. Kevorkian

1973: Hoping for a BMW
2003: Hoping for a BM

 

 

 

What a Difference 30 Years Make

At sporting events, during the playing of the National Anthem, Old Geezers hold their caps over their hearts and sing without embarrassment. They know the words and believe in them. Old Geezers remember World War I, the Depression, World War II, Pearl Harbor, Guadalcanal, Normandy and Hitler. They remember the Atomic Age, the Korean War, The Cold War, the Jet Age  and the Moon Landing, not to mention Vietnam. If you bump into an Old Geezer on the sidewalk, he will apologize. If you pass an Old Geezer on the street, he will nod or tip his cap to a lady. Old Geezers trust strangers and are courtly to women. Old Geezers hold the door for the next person and always, when walking, make certain the lady is on the inside for protection. Old Geezers get embarrassed if someone curses in front of women and children and they don't like any filth on TV or in movies. Old Geezers have moral courage. They seldom brag unless it's about their grandchildren. It's the Old Geezers who know our great country is protected, not by politicians or police, but by the young men and women in the military serving their country.